What were you doing New Year's Eve?

Happy New Year to every friend and associate of this fine blog. May 2008 bring you and your loved ones tremendous good, and none ill.

Whatever 2008 may deliver, we can be assured of one certainty: People will continue to behave in stupid ways. As proof of this assertion, we offer the following, all of which occurred within the final 24 hours of 2007:

• Two 22-year-old geniuses in Chaparral, New Mexico, shot themselves — one in the hand, the other in the arm — with a loaded .357 Magnum they were tracing to make a pattern for a tattoo.
  
  
• A naked woman was arrested in Bremerton, Washington after punching her boyfriend several times in the face and dislocating his shoulder, following an argument over whether his dog should be allowed in the bathroom while the couple showered together.
  
  
• A motorist in Paw Paw Township, Michigan knocked over a utility pole, setting her truck on fire, and continued to drive the truck until flames completely engulfed it.
  
  
• A dimwitted robber in Boston attempted to hold up a bank while a uniformed police officer was standing directly behind him.
  
  
• A 75-year-old man in Mesa, Arizona was trampled by his pet buffalo after saddling the animal and attempting to ride it.

There's a brightness control on my computer monitor, but adjusting it doesn't make the people I read about on the Internet any brighter. I doubt that will change in 2008.