Thursday, July 12, 2007

And you thought this only happened to Katie Holmes

Call it Identity Theft, NC-17.

A Houston woman named Kristen Syvette Wimberly is suing her former high school BFF, Lara Madden, who has built herself a tidy little career in adult films using the nom de porn Syvette Wimberly.

I think you can see the problem here.

The faux Syvette Wimberly (pictured above, in a rare fully clothed moment) has appeared in about a dozen motion pictures "for more mature audiences" made by porn entrepreneurs Vivid Entertainment, also named as defendants in the lawsuit. Predictably, Vivid management declined comment on the pending legal action.

The real Syvette Wimberly claims that the misappropriation of her handle for lascivious purposes has resulted in "humiliation, embarrassment, loss of enjoyment of life, emotional distress, mental anguish and anxiety."

Not to mention 20 or 30 blind dates, and numerous proposals of marriage.

I guess I'm fortunate that, to the best of my knowledge — not that I've done extensive research in this area, mind you — no male porn star has ever used my name as a pseudonym. That would be a huge burden to bear. So to speak.

Let this be a lesson to you expectant parents: If you give your child a name that sounds like a stripper or a porno queen — say, Syvette Wimberly — expect to see it splashed across a lurid DVD case someday.

Just hope that the photo next to the name isn't your daughter's.

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11 insisted on sticking two cents in:

Blogger Janet offered these pearls of wisdom...

Syvette Wimberly? Seriously. I feel sorry for the girl years before this incident even occurred.

7:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

This Laura Madden is really making a name for herself. She is dating, boyfriend, Alan Premel a former CIA officer, former professional track athlete, comic artist. How did a porn star end up with a guy like Premel? He has spoke in front of Congress twice. Once in a closed session on Intelligence matters and the second for Christians in the Middle East. Assyrian Christians and Philangists along with actress Rosie-Malek Yonan. He has been linked and already dated Paris Hilton and Rachel McAdams from the movie 'the Notebook'. She might be in this for the money, porn that is. Or she might be just in it for the sex and the fame. Well, she picked the right guy. Alan Premel is connected to Hollywood and has overseen script writing on two major spy movies and does movie reviews. He is also known as the CIA's former Covert Comic. He could turn this bad porn image into a good one. Premel does alot of philanthropy and community charity projects for children. He started Intelligence Kids in 2003 when Johhny Michael Spann, former CIA officer was killed in Afghanistan. I feel sorry for him for his image which is obviously going to be run through the mud after dating her.

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

During an interview on CNN and again with aftergood, Premel, confirmed his breakup with Laura Madden. He claims she is an amazingly gifted and talented girl and wishes her all the luck.

12:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

I think Premel posted the last comment himself. Did anyone else see his name till good ole "anonymous" brought it up? No one I have ever met in my life toots their own horn like Premel. He has some sort of driving force to announce the amount of money in his bank account or how many bitches want him for his 41 million. It's only anonymous authors that confirm that fact anyway. WTF? What the hell does he have to do with this porn shit anyway?

8:17 PM  
Anonymous Factfinder offered these pearls of wisdom...

Anonymous, you need to read

Robert Baer, not Premel, is the former CIA agent who is now a best-selling author and technical adviser for film.

Premel is a FedEx driver.

7:55 AM  
Anonymous factfinder offered these pearls of wisdom...

Sorry, the link got cut off

7:56 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

I know Premel he and Dutch-Christopher Lindeburg were in covert intelligence together in the middle east

9:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

Yeah I am sure you no alan. He is just full of bullshit. everything that comes oozing out of his mouth is a lie. He is a loser that lives with mommy and daddy and has no job. If he was so well to do why the f*ck would he live in Atascocita (sp?) Texas. Protect you Ipods people ol alan is on the prowl.

2:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

premel never stole any ipods. the truth will come out. roland carnaby stole lots from many people and passed them onto others to give out as gifts. premel is a victim as well. i know premel personally, and not only does he have hundreds of pictures to prove work from all over the world he was at home to take care of a family member who is still sick with cancer. you people are sick. small town humble haters who still rip on him because you are jealous. he is not a fedex driver also. get your facts straight. that was a discrediting piece to distance him from the carnaby debacle.

11:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

Alan Premel is such an obvious fraud! The story is a great piece in which Premel's own ex-wife calls him an absurd joke living in a make believe fantasy world! Then that loser Premel trys to shake it off by saying that was his "cover wife" who was trying to take the heat off of him. If he is actively trying to act like he is not a member of the CIA, then why does the guy brag about it so much?

Look at the guys pictures! If it's just him they are crystal clear. If they are "CIA pics" then they are blurry or obviously photoshopped!!! His photos are full of errors also. One minute he has orange hair, the next its brown. His pics from when he was "skinny" dont match at all. Different heights, different builds, different hairlines, etc.
This guy is a complete fraud. Nice try douche bag! Having proudly served my country and knowing individuals who are actually in the intelligence community, it's easy to spot a bitch like you. You're as phony as a $3 bill Alan Premel.

9:28 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous offered these pearls of wisdom...

Hey everybody,
Look at the 9th posting. That is obviously Alan Premel. That goober thinks he is so clever but his writings a.k.a. his "CIA blogs" are all full of the same grammatical errors. That guy can't capitalize names or the beginning of sentences if his life depended on it.

Can anyone actually find Alan Premel/CIA facts on a credible website that is not a blog?

Nope, because they do exist.

9:37 AM  

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