Stating the painfully obvious

A hearty SSTOL "thank you" to Nebraska Senator Chuck Hagel for saying out loud what most of us (at least, most of us not surnamed Bush) are thinking:

By any standard, when you analyze two and a half years in Iraq... we're not winning.

In a rare moment of transcendent lucidity for (a) a Republican, (b) a Nebraskan, and (c) a grown man who calls himself "Chuck," Hagel, appearing on this morning's broadcast of ABC's This Week, said concerning Iraq:

I think our involvement there has destabilized the Middle East. And the longer we stay there, I think the further destabilization will occur.

Brilliant. But obvious.

Which reminds me...

Some things in life are so incredibly obvious that one wonders why everyone can't see them. Examples:

• Adam Sandler is not funny.
  
  
• He can't act, either.
  
  
• Julia Roberts is not a pretty woman. That was just the name of a movie.
  
  
• Comb-overs do not fool anyone, nor do they make the comber-over appear more virile.
  
  
• No woman looks feminine with her hair pulled severely back from her face in the manner of a spinster librarian. Not even at the Oscars.
  
  
• Liver is not food. Even with a French name.
  
  
• Men over 45 dating women under 25 have maturity issues.
  
  
• So, with few exceptions, do women over 45 dating men under 25.
  
  
• Brown shoes with blue slacks don't make it.
  
  
• White shoes with anything don't make it, unless the shoes in question are sneakers.
  
  
• Men should not wear sandals, unless acting in a Biblical epic.
  
  
• Lara Flynn Boyle needs a sandwich. Maybe her own Quizno's franchise.
  
  
• Unless you're a burn victim, or have otherwise been disfigured congenitally, surgically, or accidentally, cosmetic surgery serves only to make public your desperate insecurity. It does not make you look better.
  
  
• Yes, that includes breast implants.
  
  
• Maybe especially breast implants.
  
  
• There will never be another James Bond except Sean Connery.
  
  
• White guys wearing do-rags or backward baseball caps look ridiculous.
  
  
• Britney Spears cannot sing.
  
  
• Neither can Hilary Duff or Lindsay Lohan, and both of them should stop trying.
  
  
• The popular success of Paris Hilton is a crime against humanity.
  
  
• No one who co-starred in either Seinfeld or Friends has any real talent. As their subsequent ventures attest.
  
  
• Batman and Robin really are gay. No matter what DC Comics says.
  
  
• People who poke holes in their anatomy where holes were never intended to go are seriously disturbed.
  
  
• Reviving the fashions of the 1970s is a bad idea.
  
  
• We're not winning in Iraq.
  
  
• No one is.