Wednesday, May 25, 2005

What's Up With That? #21: Cruising for teenyboppers

Is there some good reason why every actress being considered for the role as Tom Cruise's love interest in Mission: Impossible 3 is practically a stone's throw north of jailbait?

Originally Scarlett Johansson (age 20) was slated to costar opposite America's favorite grinning Scientologist. (Oh, please, don't write me letters — I'm actually a Cruise fan.) When Johansson abandoned the project due to scheduling conflicts, Lindsay Lohan (who won't be 19 until July, but has already been lapping the track with Bruce Willis) was rumored to be in line for the part. Now Tommy Boy's new main squeeze, Katie Holmes (26, but capable of sneaking back into high school like Cameron Crowe did while researching Fast Times at Ridgemont High), is reported to be the front-runner to ace out Lohan, with Elisha Cuthbert (22, and with all the acting talent of a Brillo pad, as any regular viewer of 24 can attest) hot on her heels. (For the record, I'm six and a half months older than Tom Cruise, so I'm on solid ground to talk here.)

Does any filmgoer, of any age, really enjoy watching middle-aged guys making time with girls in their teens and 20s? I mean, any filmgoer other than a middle-aged movie studio executive who would really like to be making time with girls in their teens and 20s himself.

Asked it before, will ask it again: Can we please stop assigning all the good female film roles to the Junior Miss Pageant? Many of us in our 40s still watch a ton of movies, and some of us actually find mature women more attractive (and, generally speaking, more talented, though that's not my issue with either Scarlett Johansson or, to a lesser degree, Katie Holmes) than the kids.

Hook us up, Hollywood.


4 insisted on sticking two cents in:

Blogger frinklin offered these pearls of wisdom...

To make matters worse, Scarlett Johansson and Natalie Portman are among those rumored to be Harrison Ford's love interest in the new Indiana Jones flick.

6:47 PM  
Blogger SwanShadow offered these pearls of wisdom...

Oh, that's just...nasty.

8:57 PM  
Blogger Sam offered these pearls of wisdom...

hey, it least it's not Abe Vigoda...

10:54 PM  
Blogger Joel offered these pearls of wisdom...

It's a marketing thingie. Aim at the younger audience so they can be brain--er--conditioned to follow said "actresses" in future movies which translates to steady cash flow.

And I'm only half-joking.

7:59 AM  

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